Redneck Computer Geek

Oh yeah!  I’ve discovered a new hobby that combines the best of both worlds:  high-technology and diggin’ in the mud!

I just got me a new White’s metal detector.  This thing has got bells and whistles out the wazoo!  It can tell me exactly what kind of metal, or even what denomination coin is under the ground, and how far under ground it is!

It occurred to me that Metal Detecting is a lot like Fishing:  it’s an un-ending string of opportunities to find something cool.  Every time I put a baited hook in the Bay, I know that I could possibly pull up a monster fish.  Now I don’t even need to be on the water.  There’s dirt EVERYWHERE!  And where I live, there’s lots of history (especially Civil War, but even pre-Revolutionary War stuff).  Not to mention the spare change and jewelry that the soccer moms lose at the ‘tot lots’. 

So it’s got all the redneck joy of fishing, plus it’s finding ‘cool stuff’ in the dirt.  You know, because rusty ol’ stuff is cool, especially if you’re a redneck, and ESPECIALLY if you’re the type of redneck that dresses up like a confederate soldier to do re-enactments.  No, I’m not that far gone yet.

But it also requires a degree of high-tech finesse!  Knowing the difference between the signal given off by a Confederate belt buckle and a smashed Pabst Blue Ribbon can under 6 inches of Virginia red clay takes some serious high-tech skills!  Not to mention you have to be a 9th-year law school student to really understand all the do’s and don’t’s of metal detecting and collecting historic relics.

So, I’m off to do some dirt-fishing.  BEEP BEEP!

I’m down here at the shore, enjoying my vacation.

Had some friends down the other day, with their kids. We had a great time fishing, splashing around chasing minnows, and crabbing.

We’re about to head out to check the crab pots. That’s a great opportunity to let the kids get out on the boat and see how crabs are caught.

There’s only one problem.

On the way out the door, I get a call from my brother. There’s a Severe Storm Warning predicted to be headed my way. They even call the time. “It’ll be over White Stone at 6:45.” Shoot…it’s only 6:15 now! Plenty of time to get out, check the pots, and get back.

I should know better. On two levels I should know better. The Redneck in me should have known that it just ain’t safe messin’ around with Mama Nature. Storms on the water are frightful things. The Computer Geek in me should have remembered that “Accu-Weather” isn’t so “Accu”. If only I could have a job where I could be wrong so often and still get paid!

So we’re out checking the pots as fast as we can. Long about 6:30 the wind picks up and the temp drops about 20 degrees. We booked it as fast as we could, nose into the wind, headed back for the pier. We threw the kids up on the dock and told them to run for the house.

The sky isn’t supposed to be that shade of green, I’m pretty sure. That left my buddy and I trying to tie the boat up in 3 foot breakers and 50 kt winds. We managed to get tied up and run up to the house before the rain started. Horizontal rain is weird.

Anywho, we’re all ok, but I’m trying to learn a lesson from all of this. I’m not sure exactly what it is, but I’m pretty sure it has something to do with Safety First. Nah…that’s not it. I’m pretty sure it’s more about the evils of weather forecasters. Yah…that’s it.

Leaving today for the ‘Rivah’.  Fishing, crabbing, boating by day, blogging and emails by night.

Here’s a sample of what a vacation packing checklist is for a Redneck Computer Geek:

• crab pots
• frozen herring (crab pot bait)
• fishing poles
• tackle boxes
• laptop
• battery charger / AC adaptor for laptop
• battery charger for Blackberry
• battery charger for other laptop
• other laptop
• fishing bait
• beer
• beer
• beer
• food

Gotta check the fishing report message forums, wind forecast, and tidal charts online while I’m down there.

Sometimes I love being a RNCG!